


The Breakening

by justkale



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Break Up, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, Moving On, The Author Regrets Everything, author is sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:41:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28013367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justkale/pseuds/justkale
Summary: Kuroo is tired of being lied too. So he finally stands up for himself.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Kudos: 8





	The Breakening

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CheCheCheer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheCheCheer/gifts).



As Kuroo walked down the icy sidewalk, he worried about his boyfriend. Kenma Kozume. They had been high school sweethearts but when Kuroo had to leave for college, they started drifting apart. The two boys had a date scheduled for that day, but Kenma had come down with a cold so they canceled. Since he wasn't feeling well, Kuroo decided to bring Kenma some of his favorite things. That included a new game, so ramen, and a slice of apple pie. But when Kuroo got to the other’s apartment his roommate answered the door.  
“Hey…” The roommate answered in a monotone voice. Kind of surprised to see him over so late.  
“Hey… is Kenma home? He told me he was sick.” Kuroo asked. You could hear the worry in his voice as he spoke.  
“No... He’s not sick. He left hours ago with a dude with orange hair.” He started and then noticed Kuroo’s face. “I think Kenma said his name was Shoyo or something.” The roommate ended. But Kuroo didn’t say anything else. He handed the bag to the roommate and left. This wasn’t the first time Kenma had lied to Kuroo about something to hang out with Shoyo. But it would be the last time. He arrived at his dorm room, ignored Bokuto’s cries for what happened, and collapsed on his bed.  
“I need to talk to you tomorrow,” Kuroo texted Kenma, not waiting for a reply. He muted the chat and fell asleep.  
* * *  
Kenma woke up at Shoyo’s house to a text from Kuroo.  
“Only one,” Kenma thought looking back at his phone. “Usually I would have a goodnight and good morning too… What happened, why does he want to talk?” He continued to think of all the possibilities of what could have happened until Hinatawoke up. And by then Kenma was shaking on the verge of a panic attack with tears in his eyes.  
“Oh my god Kenma are you okay!?” Hinata exclaimed. He had never seen Kenma cry before. Usually, he was stone cold.  
“Kuroo-. I- He wants to talk. What does he want to talk about? Why is he so serious in this message? Is he mad at me? What did I-” Kenma was cut off by Shoyo hugging him. He was trying to calm him down because he needed to hear what was happening.  
* * *  
Kuroo was on the phone with Tsukishima. He too was having a panic attack.  
“Kuroo, I need you to calm down,” Tsukki said, his normally stoic voice more motherly than normal. “Tell me what happened last night.”  
“He told me he was sick, Kei.” Kuroo answered “He lied to me. Again.”  
“Oh no…” Kei started again. “Why do you stay with him? All he ever does is hurt you.” That’s when Yamaguchi walked into camera view and immediately saw Kuroo crying.  
“Oh my god, Tetsuro are you okay?” He said as he ran over. His motherly instincts instantly kicking in.  
“I will be when I talk to him,” Kuroo replied less harshly than before answering Yamaguchi. “I can’t deal with it anymore.”  
“Was it Kenma again..?” Yamaguchi asked Tsukishima quietly. Tsukki responded with a quick nod, trying to think of a way to help Kuroo.  
“Why don’t you guys try relationship counseling?” Yams asked, trying to help the situation.  
“He wouldn’t let me drag him to that, he would rather blow me off for Shoyo,” Kuroo replied. You could hear the anger in his voice. “I don’t eve-” He was cut off by the sound of his phone chiming. He had unmuted Kenma when he woke up.  
“Yeah okay. I’ll go to your dorm.” As the spiky-haired male looked at his phone. He was starting to remember all the fun times the two of them had. All of the times they had together in high school. They never make memoreies like that together anymore. They were slowly drifting farther away from each other for years. And he had just noticed it.  
“Yeah. See you there.” Kuroo responded after coming back to the real world. He was going to do it. He was going to break up with him. After all these years of torture and crying himself to sleep at night. He had enough.  
“I gotta go, Kenma is coming over soon.” Kuroo didn’t wait for either of the two males on the computer to respond he hung up.  
* * *  
When Kuroo had hung up on the two they began to worry. What was he going to do? The question was running through both their minds.  
“He better not is doing what I think he’s doing Kei.” Yams started.  
“Why? He deserves better than him. Do you know what Kuroo told me?” Tsukishima questioned his fiance. “He told me that they haven’t seen each other in months. And the first date they have scheduled where they both have time, Kenma lies to him about being sick so he can go hang out with the tangerine.” Kei finished what he was saying and Yams looked back at the screen like he was going to cry.  
“They have been together for so long. I don’t know what he’s going to do…”  
* * *  
It was time. Kuroo had been mentally preparing himself for this moment. He didn’t want things to end like this. But they were going to have to.  
“Kuroo, Kenma is here!” Shouted the owl that he calls his best friend.  
“Let him in Bokuto!” Kuroo shouted right back at him, trying his best to sound like himself. He was going to hold the tears for Kenma.  
“Kuroo? What’s wrong? Why did we need to talk?” Kenma worriedly asked as he walked into the room.  
“Close the door. We need to have a serious conversation without the owl in the other room hearing us.” Tetsuro replied, still fighting his tears. As Kenma closed the door, he turned around. You could see the tears in his eyes. Why was he crying?  
“I’m breaking up with you,” Kuroo said quickly.  
‘Yup just gotta rip the bandaid off.’ He thought, waiting for a reply.  
“W-what?” Kenma said, starting to cry. “Why?”  
“Because I’m tired of the restless nights worrying about you. I’m tired of crying myself to sleep every night. I’m tired of you lying to me. I’m just tired.” Kuroo listed, also starting to cry. “I can’t handle it anymore Kitten. What happened? We used to be so happy. I miss that.”  
The now broken up couple were both crying with no end in sight. Bokuto walked through the bedroom door and saw both of them crying uncontrollably.  
“Oh my god! What’s wrong?” Bokuto asked frantically trying to figure out what had happened in the room before he got there.  
“We will be fine Bokuto, just leave us alone okay?” Kuroo begged, fighting an anxiety attack as he started crying more.  
“I can change Kuroo. I’ll- I’ll try and be better. Please don’t- don’t leave me. I can’t live without you.” The blonde replied, starting to hyperventilate. The early stages of a panic attack. He had them often, most of the time it wasn’t because his boyfriend was breaking up with him though.  
‘I can’t do it anymore Kenma. It’s hurting me emotionally and physically.” Kuroo continued to fight down an anxiety attack. “I need you to leave… please.” The other male noded, leaving the room and saying bye to Bokuto. He needed to see Akaashi. The only person who was ever able to calm him down.  
* * *  
He had done it. He finally pushed Kuroo past his limit. And now, he was crying on the phone while Akaashi tried to calm him down.  
“I didn’t even realize it.” Kenma started, “I was putting my feelings, and what I wanted before him. I ignored him and lied to him…” He was crying uncontrollably again. Akaashi didn’t know what to do. He might be able to handle Bokuto but Kenma was a different question. He never cried.  
“Kenma… It's good that you can see that now.” Akaashi started, trying to reason with Kenma. But at the same time, he felt bad for Kuroo. “But you need to give him some space to think. He loves you, anybody can see that.” By this point, both males were crying. The blonde was still on the way back home. Walking along the icy sidewalk. Snow falling on his face. He could hear the Christmas music everywhere as he passed Kuroo’s favorite place to eat. The ramen shop, right next to the toy shop in the center of Tokyo. The two had gone there only once in the 4 years they were together. Because they would always go somewhere Kenma wanted to go.  
“How did I just realize this?” Kenma asked himself. “I treated him horribly.” Still crying. Kenma opened the door to his apartment. He was going to eat the pain away. But when he opened the fridge, he saw a plastic bag, with the words ‘From Kuroo, To Kitten on it’, as well as a note. Seeing this Kenma started crying even harder. He picked the bag up and dashed to his bedroom where he crawled underneath his blanket and stayed there for hours. Looking at photos of Kuroo and him from highschool. His favorite one, the one from Kuroo’s graduation. When Kuroo had left him for a whole year. By himself.  
He didn’t have many friends his age, because he had always been with Kuroo. So when he saw this picture of the two of them smiling, happy together. And in the picture, Kenma also smiled. He could taste the tears on his cheeks. But at the same time, he knew it was his fault that the two broke up. He knew he never really paid attention to Kuroo because he always thought they would have each other forever. So he dialed Kuroo’s phone number. And waited for him to pick up.  
Voicemail. Somehow Kenma knew that Kuroo wouldn’t answer his phone. But he had called anyway. He needed to hear his voice.  
“Hey Kuroo, if you're hearing this then I would just like you to know that I love you. And because of that, I am willing to give you space. I will be here when you’re ready to talk. Thank you.” Then he ended the call. He was going to give Kuroo all the space he needed for the time being. He just wanted his best friend back.  
* * *  
He knew that Kenma was calling. He knew that he probably had left a voicemail. But Kuroo couldn’t bring himself to pick up the phone. He couldn’t bring himself to listen to his voice. Because if he did, he would just go running back to him.  
Kuroo had some therapy sessions to help with his depression. Hopefully, in a few months, he would be able to be himself again. But it would take years for him to get over Kenma. He was broken to the point of no return.  
“How have I not realized this until now?” He asked himself as he walked towards the therapy office. The snow had stopped, but he could still hear the faint sound of Christmas music. And he could still smell the faint smell of sugar cookies and hot chocolate.  
As Kuroo entered the building. He was met with ears full of jolly Christmas music. Christmas was his favorite time of year, because of how happy it makes him feel. But lately, he couldn’t stand the sound of the music. Or the Christmassy scents, because all they did was remind him of Kenma.  
As Kuroo waited for his name to be called, the meKeies started flooding back in. The two-building snowmen together with Bokuto and Akaashi. All the movie nights with hot chocolate and candy canes. The decorating of the Christmas tree. All the ornaments they have collected over the years together.  
“Tetsuro Kuroo?” The secretary shouted. Kuroo stood up and started walking towards the doctor. He looked quite young, around his age he had guessed.  
“So, Kuroo. What are you in here for?” The therapist asked, but Kuroo stayed quiet. He couldn’t bring himself to talk about him. He didn’t want to think about Kenma.  
“Okay. How about I introduce myself first.” Kuroo nodded, and the therapist moved on. “I’m Kurooto. What's your name?”  
“H-Kuroo.” He responded quietly. Shaking from the thoughts of Kenma, and their relationship. He had been afraid to answer. But knowing that this needed to work. He answered anyway.  
“See, does that make you feel better?” Kurooto questioned.  
“Yeah. I guess so…” Kuroo responded, still afraid to talk. As the therapy session continued, Kuroo continued to talk the least possible. Still desperately trying not to think about Kenma. He failed miserably every time. All of his thoughts were about Kenma and Kenma only. He couldn’t get his mind off of him. It was as if he had a crush on the boy again.  
He was back home at this point. Talking to Bokuto about what happened. And Bokuto just listened the whole time. Trying not to push his best friend. But it was very uncharacteristic.  
“I would think he would be crying by now…” Kuroo thought, continuing to tell Bokuto about what had happened.  
“So. You guys broke up?” Bokuto asked, still trying not to overstep.  
“Yeah. I really hope I can bring myself to talk to him soon…” Kuroo replied, happy that his friend is accepting this.  
“Me too. I hate seeing you like this. I don’t know what I would do in your situation.” Bokuto responded back to him. Kuroo could tell that he was trying not to imagine him and Akaashi not being together,  
“I don’t know what you would do either…” Kuroo responds with a fake laugh at the end. Trying to seem happy in front of his friend so he didn’t worry too much.  
“Alright, well I got to go. I’ll see you later. You sure you don’t need anything?” Bokuto asked while grabbing his keys and wallet.  
“No… I should be fine. You have fun on your date okay Bokuto.” Kuroo said as he walked back into his room. He turned on some sappy Christmas love story’s and fell asleep.  
Kuroo had a dream that night. He would describe it more as a nightmare. One where he caught Kenma cheating on him with Shoyo. That was the worst night sleep he had in a long time. Because it made all of his thoughts become a reality. He was given a clear vision of all of his fears.  
When he woke up the next morning he was sweating. Tears running down his face as he cried. Christmas movies still playing in the background. Kuroo checked his phone again. The same voicemail that he had seen yesterday. He decided that he was going to listen to it. He thought that he would be able to control his emotions.  
“Hey Kuroo, if you're hearing this then I would just like you to know that I love you. And because of that, I am willing to give you space. I will be here when you’re ready to talk. Thank you.” He instantly regrets his decision. He needed to go and talk to him. If he was going to be able to live on this planet he needed to see Kenma. And so, he called him.  
As the phone rang, Kuroo started to regret this. He was about to hang up when Kenma answered the phone.  
“Kuroo?” Kenma sighed as he waited for an answer. “You don’t have to talk. I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry that I always put myself before you.” He started to cry at this point. He tried to think of a time that Kenma has sounded so sincere.  
“I don’t need to be back together Kuroo…” Kenma told him. “I just need to be able to be friends still. I have known you for the longest time. You were my very first-”  
“Kenma…” Kuroo cut him off.  
“No, it’s okay I get it…” Kenma says. “I probably wouldn’t be able to forgive myself either.”  
“I-” Kuroo stops himself. Trying not to hurt the younger boys’ feelings. “I just… I can’t do it again Kenma.  
“That’s okay…” Kenma sighed.  
“I’ll see you some other time than?” Kuroo told him. Hoping that they would be able to make this work.  
“I don’t think so Kuroo. If we can’t be friends I can’t do this…” Kenma replied.  
“Okay. I guess I will be going then… Bye.” Kuroo didn’t wait for a reply. He hung up and fell back down onto his bed.  
“I need to get out of the house.” He told himself. But never ended up leaving until Bokuto got home and dragged him out of his room.  
“Where are we going?” Kuroo asked, being dragged away from the comfort of his own room.  
“I’m taking you out,” Bokuto told him.  
“Woah dude, I don’t like you like that!” Kuroo joked at him. Trying to keep his mind off Kenma yet again.  
“I’m being serious, Kuroo. I’m taking you somewhere to get your mind off of him.” Bokuto told him putting on a stern face. “You need to stop blaming yourself for what happened. We both know that it was not your fault.”  
“Yeah, Yeah I know.”  
The two ended up at a sushi bar, and to Kuroo’s surprise, all of his friends were there. Everybody he had met over the years. Even Daichi was here. That surprised him.  
“What?” Kuroo questioned after seeing everybody “Why are you all here?”  
“We heard what happened,” Hinata told him, rubbing his neck. “I mean it is partially my-”  
“Don’t say that… It’s not your fault. It’s all Kenma’s fault Shoyo.” Kuroo cut him off, getting mad at the shorter boy for blaming himself.  
“Well anyways. We wanted to cheer you up!” Lev told him. The blonde then ran over to give him a hug. Before that happened however Yaku pulled him back over.  
“I told you to give him space Lev!” Yaku shouted at him as he pulled him back to where he was standing before.  
That night his friends helped him completely forget about the breakup. That was the best night he had out in years. Friends making sure he stayed occupied so he wouldn’t think about Kenma. They went ice skating later in the night. A drunk Bokuto and Daichi ended up throwing up everywhere. Akaashi ended up having to bring most of them home because they drank too much. Kuroo did end up with a hangover the next morning but he decided it was worth it and he had fun. Bokuto and the rest made sure he had fun the next day, all checking upon him. And he thanked them for that.  
He and Kenma never did end up getting back together, But they had become friends again and that was all Kuroo wanted from the relationship.I

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it, I originally wrote this for a school assignment.


End file.
